90s, Commercials, featured, food
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“You’re not just good, You’re GOLDEN!”

Remember when you could make anyone do anything you want by simply offering them a box of Golden Grahams? No? Well you could okay. In fact I’m pretty sure this was the tactic used to start the Iraq war (too soon?).  I think it’s about time I brought this brand of mind games back for my own personal benefit….

Me: Hello Rashida Jones, want to get married?

Rashida Jones: Why would I want to do that?

Me: Oh I don’t know maybe because I have these (Ben shows Rashida a box of Golden Grahams)

Rashida Jones: Yes! Let’s spend the rest of our lives together!

annnnnnnd scene.

The one flaw in my plan is that Rashida will no doubt dump me after the box is empty, and what can I do? I mean who is gonna have 2 boxes of Golden Grahams lying around? That’s just insane!

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